Why’s it always a goddamn mad wizard? I want to see other classes build dungeons.
The mad fighter’s dungeon, which is a tactical nightmare of Tucker’s Kobold proportions.
A mad sorcerer’s dungeon, which is like a wizard dungeon but she has to make it using only 15 spells so it’s kind of predictable and crap.
A mad bard’s dungeon, which is that giant floor piano from Big but as a puzzle. And there’s just a gynosphinx dishing out lame riddles. Ad naseum.
A barbarian’s dungeon, which is just a hole in the ground with spikes. And he’s just there.
A mad thief’s dungeon is one where you think you know what to expect – whirring blades, narrow walkways, treasure chests rigged to explode. But it seemed like a pretty bland dungeon at first – just endlessly curving passageways carved into rock with the occassional security spell to bypass. It was weird, but nothing that an entire party of adventurers would have trouble with.
You break through the steel wall encasing what you thought was the mastermind’s lair, and realise that the thief isn’t there – it’s the city bank’s vault!
Your spells and weapons have carved a path from the dungeon entrance out in the woods all the way here, and the mad thief has been making Hide checks every few minutes to stealth alongside the party every step of the way, emerging only to claim the loot for themselves. The treasure vanishes before your very eyes, just in time for the bank’s guards to open the vault and see your party awkwardly standing around.
A theif’s dungeon would be the worst. The one who goes in and disarms the traps? Yeah, that’s the guy that knows how to make the traps impossible to disarm, the locks uncrackable, the poison darts murderous.
I couldn’t come up with a thief’s dungeon joke, because every other class is a tresspasser in the dungeon. The rogue is the dungeoneer. It’s the ol’ briar patch, and if you hear of a dungeon made by a retired assassin or thief, do not go near it.
The mad Druids dungeon- It’s just a hell forest. No paths, no markers, no way to find were anything is besides remembering which tree you’ve past and unless you know the forest by heart or can ask that sparrow for directions good luck. Even if you could speak to them, the druid has been spreading rumors amoungst the wildlife that you and your party have come to destroy their home, so all the wild beast are hostile and you’re too busy being chased by wolves and bears to find your way around.
I don’t know what the mad monk’s dungeon looks like but the monk looks like this
This is a really good point to bring up because monks tend to opperate in ways so outside the norm for most D&D classes that dungeon made by a high-level monk for a high-level monk would be exhausting for anyone else to deal with. Hope you have full-party spider-climb or flight, you unenlightened chucklefucks
hes just chilling in his zen garden, you say ‘hi’ and then he starts punching you while reciting koan
You know I bet the reason found family stories are so popular with aros is because we all subconsciously want to vicariously live out the fantasy of having a group of people who are committed to supporting and spending time with us
Bitch get some friends
Bitch you volunteering?
To clarify further: This post isn’t about not having friends. This is about the fact that there’s a certain level of commitment and intimacy that, in our society, people rarely apply to friendships. There’s a reason the trope is called found family and not found friends.
A friend might be a classmate you get along well with, or someone you met at an event who has the same favorite TV show as you, or your buddy you swap memes with, or the guys in your anime club. And that’s nice and all, but the relationship doesn’t often go much deeper than that.
Potentially living together, sharing your deepest thoughts and insecurities, supporting each other closely when you’re sick or hurting, sticking together no matter what even if someone changes interests or stops attending an event… Those are things that people generally reserve only for romantic partners, or in some cases immediate family members. Friendships only very rarely get these kinds of relationships, and for aromantics, that can be really damaging.
Yes, believe it or not, I have friends. A lot of aros do. But that doesn’t mean we aren’t lonely, or don’t feel like we’re missing something in our lives, because it’s absolutely not just a simple matter of “make some friends lol”. Found family stories represent an idealized life that many of us may never get to have, and it’s pretty rude and dismissive to make fun of that.
It makes me so happy that I find stuff like this floating around now, however rare. I’m not used to actually seeing stuff on romance/relationships that’s relatable w/o it being pushed as a joke, and I’ve literally had my mind set on a found family dynamic for my life since I was like 12. It was poorly formulated in my head back then, and it makes me painfully introspective at times, but now I’m finding words for it. So thanks~ 👏🏻
I’ve had people ask me about QP relationships and what sets them apart from friendships and romantic relationships. This post sums it up pretty well.
To anyone with an eating disorder on Thanksgiving: I know it’s scary. Stay safe. You deserve to enjoy your dinner. Treat yourself kindly after you eat. You can do this, and I love you.
I'm Still Kicking 