You know what bugs me about soulmate aus? So, I’m assuming that this whole “the first thing your soulmate says to you blahblahblah” is a worldwide thing. So many of the aus I’ve read have a quote at some point that addresses how tragic it is when people have soul words that say something like “hi” or “‘sup” which makes NO SENSE! In a world where the first thing you say to people is THAT important, WHY GOD WHY would the culture still use standard greetings? Who the fuck is still saying hello at this point? Everyone in these worlds would surely develop a personalized greeting different from everybody else’s to prevent confusion. Like how no 2 racehorses can have the same racing name? The best part is that every time people met someone new for the first time, they would try to say something that no one else had said. You’d have people meeting eachother at a job intetview, they’d shake hands, smile politely, then one of them would be like “Every Tuesday, I hard even grape purple farm house sunsets too” and this would be perfectly normal. Or you’d go up to the cash register at Starbucks and instead of saying “Hello, what can i get for you today?” She’d look you right in the eye and say “I don’t know what Space Jam is” THEN ask you what you want and she’d repeat that to every customer in the line for the rest of her career. And because they live in the AU, nobody would think it was weird.
^^In which AUs get interesting with their world building. I love it.
A world where everyone has their own, increasingly bad, pickup lines
Sounds like my kind of world
I actually read one singular fanfic that actually used this idea and it was great, but for the life of me I can’t even remember what fandom it was for
Imagine the ultimate insult though! Saying, Hi, or Hello when first meeting someone would imply “I don’t care if we are soulmates, I don’t want to even try with you.
No! Don’t you see? If you greet someone with just “hi” it means one thing: you’ve already found your soulmate. Giving a simple greeting when you first meet someone is a sign you should be congratulated.
can you imagine being batman and getting fucking PRESSED over the smallest things in life – you can’t have fun with wordplay, because the riddler has tried to stab you with wordplay a few hundred times and now it’s stopped being funny. “there are 30 cows and 28 chickens, how many didn’t?” get FUCKED, edward. and you can’t enjoy owls, and also white walls, or limestone, or people in owl costumes because once you were trapped for a week and hunted like an animal in a maze by weird ass owl people, and vivid hallucinations were involved, and it SUCKED. you can’t deal with guys in priest outfits because the last priest you were in contact with trapped you in a sewer, tortured you, and force-fed you drugs to brainwash you into becoming a cultist. ventriloquism is done for, and probably so are puppets in general. can’t listen to a goddamn preschooler go, “step on a crack, break your momma’s back,” without screeching to a grinding halt because HEY YOU SNOT-NOSED TWERP, I HAD MY SPINE CRACKED IN HALF LIKE SOMEONE CRACKING A GLOWSTICK. you can’t play a card game without thinking about the lady who ate people’s hearts. you can’t put on your own damn costume without thinking about the time someone shipped poison-laced batman costumes to people and killed them. every time you look at a school building you can think of any of these things: “oh, in high school i was once so miserable i illegally signed on for electroshock therapy after setting my teacher’s lawn on fire,” or, “i was bullied horrifically at a boarding school where the headmaster was an immortal satanist who murdered my only friend, and when i finally got out, THEN my parents were brutally murdered,” or, “my DEAD FUCKING SON, the SON that I HAVE who is DEAD, loved school.” what the fuck. what the fuck dude. guns might be at the top of the shit list, closely followed by pearls, but GODDAMN the shit list goes on for another 4 miles
I’m glad this article highlights that if this man made it to shore and had extended contact with these people, he would have exposed them to diseases they’ve never seen before and potentially killed them all. There’s a reason it’s illegal to go there, and Jesus isn’t gonna protect them from chicken pox or the flu.
Like honestly who asked you to do this. Who asked you to buy a plane ticket and go there. Like just go to the movies ?? Live your life?? Eat a crepe?? Who asked you to do this
Apparently it was his dream since high school to bring The Jesusness SPECIFICALLY to these people on this island. He was obsessed with Robinson Crusoe all his life and as a child he used to “paint his face with berry juice and run around the woods with a spear.“ I’m not making any of this up this guy had a total fucking hard-on for the idea that he might one day be the white savior of some ~poor ignorant heathens.
Not to in any way justify or excuse anything this dumbass did, but he appears to have been Asian-American, not white.
Just a quick message of love to my fellow Native Americans who either mourn on Thanksgiving or who skip over the holiday entirely: you are so fucking valid and however you tackle this holiday–whether it is with anger, grief, or outright denial that it counts as a holiday at all–just know that you have the right to do so. Don’t let colonizers try to guilt you into celebrating a holiday you aren’t ready to or don’t want to reclaim.
I'm Still Kicking 